Ese es el slogan que tiene una marca de tortillas y similares aquí en México. También dice: una tortilla tiene las mismas calorías que una zanahoria, coño, pero nojoda, vergación!, quien diablos se va a jartar 8 zanahorias? y claro, tan finitas las coños’e madre que uno termina jalándose el paquetico de 10 en una sentada.
A diferencia del slogan, o más bien, el complemento, los mexicanos dicen: “la tortilla no engorda, lo que engorda es el relleno!”. Ahí si estamos hablando el mismo idioma, porque carajo, pasaron una de dos cosas desde que llegué aquí hace dos años y dos meses: o en Venezuela pasé hambre que jode luego de pelar boloña un tiempo por haber participado como integrante de PDVSA en las manifestaciones contra el otro marico’e mierda o aquí en México me he sobrealimentado, porque ya llevo 17 kilos de diferencia a mi favor (bueno, en mi contra) desde que llegué, y eso es ahorita porque llegué en un momento a más de 20 kilos de diferencia. Mi peso al llegar era de 74 kilos.
Se que tengo la maña de que todo lo nuevo se prueba para ver si es sabroso o no, quizás he probado muchas cosas, hasta me reprochan todavía haber comido gusanos con guasacaca.
Menos mal que cuando hago ejercicios boto los kilos como patrón venezolano bota empleados en crisis económica. En un mes de medio ir al gimnasio rebajé 5 kilos, y otros 2 kilos mientras caminada y no me compraba la nave.
Como tengo un año exactamente sin hacer ejercicios (la ley es empezar en enero y dejarlo en febrero), la pereza que me da ir a correr sobre una máquina es inmensa. Pero ni modo.
Y no, no ando gordote, más bien en Venezuela estaba demasiado flacucho, me llevaba el viento. Yo pienso que llegando a los 80 kilos es una buena medida para mi altura y contextura.
Mientras estuve pensando en empezar a comer puras cosas de dieta, por ahí vi un restaurant que decía: “Cerdo frito de dieta”.
16 replies on “La tortilla no engorda!”
I used to be able to find good advice from your content.
I do not even know how I ended up here, but I
thought this post was good. I don’t know who you are but
certainly you’re going to a famous blogger if you are not already 😉 Cheers!
Hey There. I found your blog using msn. This is a very well written article.
I’ll make sure to bookmark it and return to read more of your
useful information. Thanks for the post. I will certainly
return.
Hi there! I understand this is kind of off-topic
however I needed to ask. Does building a well-established
blog such as yours require a massive amount work? I’m brand new to operating a blog however I do write in my journal
every day. I’d like to start a blog so I can easily share my experience and feelings online.
Please let me know if you have any kind of recommendations or tips for new aspiring bloggers.
Thankyou!
Hello there! Quick question that’s entirely off
topic. Do you know how to make your site mobile friendly?
My web site looks weird when viewing from
my iphone 4. I’m trying to find a template or plugin that might be able to resolve this problem.
If you have any suggestions, please share. Thank you!
I’m not sure exactly why but this website is
loading extremely slow for me. Is anyone else having this problem or is it
a problem on my end? I’ll check back later on and see
if the problem still exists.
What a information of un-ambiguity and preserveness of valuable knowledge regarding unexpected emotions.
Hi, very nice website, cheers!
——————————————————
Need cheap and reliable hosting? Our shared plans start at $10 for an year and VPS plans for $6/Mo.
——————————————————
Check here: https://www.reliable-webhosting.com/
Excellent web site. Plenty of useful information here.
I’m sending it to several pals ans also sharing in delicious.
And obviously, thanks to your effort!
If some one desires to be updated with latest technologies afterward he must be go to see this
site and be up to date every day.
Its like you read my mind! You appear to know so much about
this, like you wrote the book in it or something. I think that
you could do with some pics to drive the message home
a bit, but other than that, this is wonderful blog.
A fantastic read. I’ll definitely be back.
Howdy, i read your blog from time to time and i own a similar one
and i was just wondering if you get a lot of
spam feedback? If so how do you prevent it, any plugin or anything you can recommend?
I get so much lately it’s driving me mad so any assistance is
very much appreciated.
What’s up, yeah this piece of writing is genuinely fastidious and I have
learned lot of things from it regarding blogging. thanks.
Having read this I believed it was rather informative.
I appreciate you finding the time and effort to put this content together.
I once again find myself spending a lot of time both reading and
posting comments. But so what, it was still worthwhile!
Hey there 🙂
Your wordpress site is very sleek – hope you don’t mind me asking what
theme you’re using? (and don’t mind if I steal it?
:P)
I just launched my site –also built in wordpress like yours– but
the theme slows (!) the site down quite a bit.
In case you have a minute, you can find it by searching for “royal cbd” on Google
(would appreciate any feedback) – it’s still in the works.
Keep up the good work– and hope you all take care of yourself during the coronavirus scare!
Greetings from Ohio! I’m bored to tears at work
so I decided to check out your website on my iphone during lunch break.
I really like the information you provide here and can’t
wait to take a look when I get home. I’m surprised at how quick your blog loaded on my cell phone ..
I’m not even using WIFI, just 3G .. Anyways, amazing site!